Something between us. What did she mean? Was it something more than the sum total of the words spoken? I had just told her that I didn’t want to make her uncomfortable, so I was afraid to ask, to pursue it further. She mentioned the nude painting a few times again, but whenever I asked if she wanted to do it, she said she wasn’t sure yet. I was patient. I tried not to let it show how eager I was to see her body naked, laid out for me to caress with my minds eye and stroke over the canvas board with my brushes. How often I had imagined it and dreamed about it, hoping that somehow she might feel the same way about me. Alone in the night I let the fantasy take me away, to heights of pleasure. But when she was in the room, standing so near me I could feel her body heat and smell her shampoo, I would say nothing of the desires that burned within my heart. Finally the day came. “I’m ready,” she told me resolutely. I didn’t have to ask what she meant. It had been on my mind for so long, and. She always thought he was devoted toher. She didn't know what to do. "There are possible actions you can take. I know this is a shockto you and you have to think it out. There are alternatives todivorce you know. I know divorce is the first thing you thinkabout. It was the first thing I thought about when I divorced Tom.Now, I wish I had gone down a different path." "What can I do? I never thought he would betray me!" Jean slowly elaborated for her saying, "Well, you could make histool useless for sex. Of course that means you wouldn't get use outof it. But it is an option." "I don't know if I want him to make love to me anymore if he istraipsing around with other women." "I can get concentrated estrogen. It's called Poly-Estro. It canmake it impossible to get hard in three days. The bad part is thatit can cause him to develop boobs and other femininecharacteristics." Tracy said, "Well, it may be worth a try. If he develops boobsbig enough I'll have to get him to wear a bra..
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